Good morning friends.
First off, I'm sorry for the little disappearing act last week.
As many of you already know, we had to put out sweet Lola bear to sleep on Thursday and well, after that, I just needed a little sadness time.
I had called the vet on Wednesday, knowing it was time, and that span between the phone call and our appointment the next morning, was absolutely the worst 24 hours of my life...I felt like I was playing god and to watch my dog spend her last day with us, knowing what was coming...well, it was hell...and don't get me started on the agony of trying to explain what was happening to my kids...poor Scarlett was inconsolable and Tasha...well let's just say I've never seen her so sad.
It was hard...really, really donkey ball suckage hard.
In the end, Lola went very quickly...she was obviously so ready to go and that makes me feel a little more at peace but our house is so damn empty without her...the quiet and lack of chaos, makes for a weird energy and it seems as though most of us just don't know what to do with the silence.
My little Mac said to Scarlett not to be sad because 'in his dream, Lola had no more bumps' and honestly, those words of a 3 year old are helping me buckets. It makes me endlessly happy to imagine her up there in the clouds, all regal and well like in the picture above. I just know she's bounding through the fields, eating all the ice cream and steak she can get her paws on...free of bastard cancer.
And as for yours truly, as of today...
...god I love these cards.
And speaking of the one above, boy did I find out a little piece of dooziness last week.
I'm sure I've complained about feeling crappy on here before.
Maybe I haven't...my brain is mush at the moment.
The short version is that for years, basically ever since I had Scarlett, my body just hasn't been working right...tired, headachey, nerve pain, mental foginess...I could go on...I've seen a bunch of doctors, had 2 CAT scans, more tests than I can possibly describe and at the end of all of it, have been told it's anxiety and to try and relax...at which point, I look at each doctor and want to chop their effing heads off...if I felt good people, I'd be relaxed.
Fast forward to about a month ago when I decide to try out some acupuncture and see naturopath...after 38 years on this planet and not one single doctor thinking to test me for food allergies, the naturopath orders up some very extensive blood work and on Thursday, I got called in for the results.
So...after YEARS OF FEELING LIKE POOPDOGS and not knowing why, it turns out that I have a severe intolerance to milk and eggs, to the point that I actually have an anahaphalactic allergic to both.
Seriously...what the fuck...how could something so simple be missed for SO long?
Also, I'm happy...finally, this bullshit is not just in my head...finally, I can do something about it...unfortunately, this change means I have to give up my absolute fave food group...the thought of life without mayo, ricotta, cheese, butter, yogurt, baked goods...well, it's isn't exactly my happy place BUT the thought of feeling great...well, that is my happy place so onwards and upwards....no milk or eggs for this cat.
I guess that sums up my last few days in a nutshell.
In other news, I did burry the food allergy stuff/dog sadness with some weekend projects.
For one, hubster and I spent an entire day fixing up the yard...did buckets of edging, trimming, weeding, planting and the like...and since the deck project is on hold, I souped it up as best as I could for now...
...still want an outdoor rug for under the table but for now, it's looking pretty OK.
I also painted...hubs surprised me with some belated b-day gifts, since I was away on the actual day...this easel was one of them...
...and with it, I was able to get two pieces done...the one above morphed into this...
...and is now up in the shop.
I also, finished this little lady called Belle...
...she'll be framed in gold and listed later today.
Along with the easel, the Mr also took me antiquing on Saturday and insisted that I bring lady cheetah pants home with me as part of the b-day package...
...know as you know, I already have a LARGE ceramic animal collection so even though I've been looking for one of these spotted beauties forever, I had a moment of reservation about adding to the menagerie but...in the end, I just couldn't resist...didn't hurt that I practically stole her either.
I'll have to edit out some of the other creatures in the living room...perhaps they'll find new homes upstairs but in the meantime, Ms C is looking pretty heavenly in her new spot...
And with that, I'll sign off for now with a big thank you kiss/hug...your FB, Instagram, Twitter messages these past few weeks have helped in so many ways...heart you all.